This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

This is a work of fiction, any resemblance to real people or places is purely coincidence.

Thursday:

I was awoken by Lily quietly asking me if I wanted to help this morning

I startled awake, uh, ok.

I put on the capris, and one of the new tops, and we walked over to the dining hall, me kind of bleary eyed

Did you sleep ok? Lily asked

Not really, had nightmares

Thats too bad, still worried about your parents?

Yeah, but like, they have to know eventually, and I figure better they find out via the play than

So you are going to tell them?

Something like Marie suggested last night I think

Ooh, leave it mysterious, sounds good

Yeah, heres hoping I said, crossing my fingers

It will go ok! Im sure of it Lily beamed at me

We got to the dining hall and Lily banged on the door

Oh! You did get up! You weren’t on the porch this morning when I came back from my shower.

I had kind of a fitful sleep, but Lily woke me up

You should’ve let her sleep Lily, Liz admonished her, she needs her rest for tonight

It’s ok, besides, extra food also good for tonight

Marie laughed, acting can be a hungry business thats for sure

Lily and I helped sweep and put down chairs while Liz and Marie hauled things in and out of the back room.

We got in line and today’s breakfast was pancakes and bacon and some scrambled eggs, Millie sat next to us and we discussed the play some.

Claire breezed in with slips of paper and started making the rounds of the tables, finding each cast and crew member to hand a slip to, and I sat there holding it looking at it.

Gonna tell them Millie asked?

Yeah, I think so

Same! I didn’t do the play last year, for what its worth, I was a discrete brochure recipient, and it was hard for me to come out, but when my parents came on Saturday it went really well!

Thats good, fingers crossed same

So what are we getting up to this morning? Millie asked

Hrm, whats the handicraft hut up to this morning? I asked

Lily pulled out her slightly tattered and heavily marked schedule, Looks like its basket weaving? And she made kind of a face

Not in to baskets? I asked

Just seems kind of… boring?

yeah, not really my speed

Anything else?

Oh, says here there’s a field day thing on the field today, bunch of random activities

Ooh! That was fun last year Millie said, we should do that

What’s a field day?

It’s uh, theres three legged races, and various silly relays, and usually some games like bean bag toss, horseshoes, that kind of thing

Oh that does sound fun I said

We’ll have to miss the bits in the afternoon to do the rehearsal, but thats ok, its cooler back at the theater in the afternoon than out in the field without much shade

Lily and I walked back to to Caterpillar after breakfast really quick, and I grabbed my phone which I had remembered to leave on its charger so it had some charge… but signal was lacking

Hrm, maybe there’s wifi at the dining hall? Lily asked, oh, and I should grab my phone and she went and rummaged in her locker, oh drat, its drained

Here, plug it in to my charger

Thanks, I forgot mine, I can text them at lunch real quick

Ooh, right, we traipsed back across the field, where staff and campers were setting up various courses, poles and flags and festive tape denoting course

We got to the dining hall just as Marie was coming out

Oh hi! She said noticing my phone, wanting to text your parents?

Yes, but there’s no good signal here

Yeah, there’s wifi although it isn’t used much, there’s a QR code for campers inside the dining hall to scan!

Sound good, thanks I said smiling

Need any help with what to say?

Nope, I think I know what I want to send

Ok! See you this afternoon for dress rehearsal than!

Lily and I went inside and she found the QR code which I scanned and was quickly connected.

In the group text with mom and dad I sent,

Hey mom and dad, so I’m in the play the camp is putting on tonight, I’ll leave who I’m playing a surprise. I might not see any responses til after the play, but I love you and hope you enjoy the play tonight!

And I carefully typed in the URL and even checked it to make sure something was there that seemed right, and it had a ‘Coming tonight live from Camp Sunshine!’. And then I got nervous

Hey it will be ok, right? It’s just a play

Just a play where I play one of the most famous leading ladies of all time… opposite a Demi girl Romeo…

Just breathe Lily encouraged

My finger was wavering over the send button and then suddenly I had hit it

Oh shit I said, I did it, it’s sent, uh, ok, time to put this away I think

You should keep it with you today Lily smiled, just in case

Right, ok, I slipped it in to the back pocket of my pants because the front pockets were nearly nonexistent, but I turned on silent first

Ready for field day? Lily beamed

I looked anxious but then decided that was silly, Yup, let’s do this!

Yay!

Not every camper was there, but a good fifty percent of the camp turned out

Lily and I came in third in the three legged race which I was pretty happy about, and Millie, Lily, Billie and I trounced the competition at the egg carry relay

At the end of it I was a bit tired but mostly hungry, even after partaking of some of the snacks available

Lily ran back to the cabin really quick before lunch to grab her phone

We joined the others at the dining hall for a turkey sandwich and chips, which was not the greatest this week, but it was filling

Lily went and grabbed the wifi password and quickly texted her parents, who texted right back that they would be watching

Claire got on the microphone right after that, remember cast and crew! Dress rehearsal right after lunch! As soon as you finish head that way, we’ve got lots to do!

Lily accomplished her usual disappearing act somehow with her meal and I wasn’t too far behind. Millie was a bit back and said for us to go on ahead

Well this morning was fun Lily said

It’s the most fun all week so far and that’s an impressive bar.

Did you check your phone ever?

Nope. Don’t really want to anyways, too scared and don’t need more any more nerves before the play

That’s fair

We arrived at the theater gate and Claire and Marie and a couple other staffers and a few campers were already there. The stage was finished, the crew had finished painting bits, the ladders and draped cloths were all put away and it looked really nice

Carly! Let’s get you going, lots to do before tonight Marie called to me

She took both of us back and had us change in to the first layers of our costumes then set us down at a makeup table,

Ever try makeup before?

No I said quietly

Lily said all mom allows me so far is some lip gloss and blush

Well don’t worry too much, because stage makeup is SUPER different to regular makeup, and I’ll be doing it now and again before the show tonight

Ok I said

She started with me, dipping a triangular sponge in to a kind of creamy tan that was about my skin color, and spreading it all over my face. She smoothed it out, then went on to apply some lipstick that was different from any I had ever seen in commercials and such, then using a couple different liner pencils highlighted my eyes, the outer edge of my lips, and finished with a bit of blush on my cheeks

Now just stay right there and don’t touch it, it needs to cure a bit. She proceeded to do the same to Lily, and then other campers started coming in and lining up, and another camper with experience joined Marie in helping those who needed it.

After a bit, Claire came backstage, ok, I think all of you are here now and in process at least, we are going to get you all costumed up, makeup, hair, and then we are going to get on with the show!

She came over to Millie and I and said ok Carly, we should’ve talked about this sooner, but would you be interested in trying a wig tonight? We’ve got a few ready styled for various ladies in Shakespeare plays, but it’s also ok if not, short haired girls are girls too!

I blushed, I think I would like that, I know I don’t have hair to style really

So Claire went off to the props closet and came back with a wig on a stand, I think this one would look nice on you, it was a basic brown wig, with a braided crown of hair and flowers on top, with some long hair hanging down the back, and my eyes just lit up, ooh

You like?

I nodded, yes

Ok, let’s see how it looks on you!

She sat it down in front of me, and then put my hair under a wig cap, then she put the wig on me and used some Bobby pins to help hold it in place

Ok, let’s get you in to your dress and you can see how you look before we get started

Claire helped me get in to the dress by holding it for me to step into then pulling it up and helping me get it closed

Remember! At intermission you have a costume change

Right I said, ok

It wasn’t too much long before everyone was all dressed up and we did look pretty nice as an ensemble

Oh you all just look amazing Claire beamed at us standing on stage, ok everyone, places! We are going straight through, if you miss a line just work with it as best you can!

We got in to places and she gave us queues on when to start and it went pretty well, she didn’t have any notes individually or collectively afterwards

Ok, we are going to help you all get out of costume, clean the makeup off, and then it will be supper time! We used to do it here but there were some incidents she laughed, nothing bad mind you, but one time someone spilled a sloppy joe on a white shift the lead was going to wear, and we only had the one

We laughed, and started getting changed. Marie helped me out of my dress and set the wig on its stand, and then helped me get my makeup off. Lily removed her own with a brief instruction of how

I was finally changing back in to my capris and shirt and my phone fell out of my pocket and clattered to the ground outside the curtained changing stall

Marie picked it up, and slid it in past the curtain, you dropped this sweetie!

I picked it up and by habit unlocked it and saw in the notifications a message from both dad and mom

oh wow! Congrats on the part, we are looking forward to it!

wouldn’t miss it for the world sweetie!

I kind of froze.

A few minutes went by and I heard Marie call, are you ok in their Carly?

I squeaked out a noise that I don’t know what was

Oh, are you decent? She asked through the curtain

I nodded then realized I had to actually say something

Yes…

What’s the matter?

They are going to be watching

Of course they are sweetie, that’s why you texted them, and they care about you

I uh, I know, I was just not wanting to know for certain they would be til after

Also why do I have signal here?

Oh that’s the wifi, same network and password as the office and dining hall, for providing the stream tonight. Cell signal is even worse down here at the stage in this hollow

Oh. Hadn’t thought of that. Guess there isn’t much I can do to back out now is there

Sure there is! You don’t have to do this, we’ve had kids back out before, even leads, we make it work, do you want to back out?

Not really

Ok, come on kiddo, let’s go get some supper! The condemned deserve a good last meal she laughed

I grimaced, that we do and laughed myself

thats the spirit

Lily was waiting outside for me and we all walked towards the dining hall

So what took so long? Lily asked

I uh, my parents said they would be watching

Oh and you freaked out a bit?

Yup…

You doing ok now?

Mostly, some food will probably help

We got up to the dining hall and got in line behind most of the cast, and the festivities were just wrapping up for the field day

The doors opened and we shuffled forward a bit

So what do you think we are getting tonight?

Spaghetti? I think? Marie said

Ooh, yummie! Lily said

Just don’t eat too much! Not good to be stuffed and trying to act, there will be an after party for cast and crew that the dining staff provides

Ooh, what do they bring?

It’s a surprise Marie said, winking

We got our plates, and it was indeed spaghetti and meatballs, it was good but I didn’t eat very much of it, I was too nervous

Lily had finished her plate again, I was unsure how she fit it in, much less so quick, but she looked at my plate and said wow, you must really be nervous

Yeah… lets just get this done with I think

Ok!

Lily and I headed out early to the theater, almost everyone was still eating, but Claire was there when we arrived

Oh hey! Welcome back! Ready for tonight?

I uh, yeah, I think so, my parents are going to be watching

Oh thats wonderful! Im glad you told them, I know it will go fine

You ready to get ready already? You are here a bit earlier, did you get enough to eat?

I got as much as my stomach wanted given tonight, also Marie said there was an after party?

Yup! Acting is hungry and stressful, you deserve to unwind afterwards

Want to get ready?

Sure, I guess, not sure what else I would do

Stare off in to the distance and dissociate? Thats what I did way back when, when I was nervous before a show Claire laughed

I laughed, honestly, I’ve dissociated too much of my life already as it is

Okie doke then!

She let us back stage, and we got changed in to our costumes, I sat down looking in a mirror and not too long after Marie breezed in, oh there you are! and in full costume already, great! I saw you head out of the dining hall early, and decided I had better hurry up and get over here

Did you get enough to eat Lily asked, sounding concerned.

I did, don’t worry, I was not nearly as active today as you two were, and Im not growing nearly as much anymore as I was back then, so its ok

ok, let’s get you going with makeup then! She took her time this time, being extra careful to not get anything on the costume, and as a final touch, added what she called a ‘beauty mark’ under my left eye with her eye liner pencil.

She then got my hair under the wig cap, making sure every last strand was corralled under it, and carefully put the wig on, pinning it in place, and fussed with the free portion.

Meanwhile others had started coming in, and one of the other campers helped Lily with her makeup, and then got changed themself and did their own makeup. In not too long a time, we were all dressed and in makeup, and Claire poked her head in the door, oh good, you all are ready!

Preshow pep talk time! I’ll keep it short. You’ve worked hard at this, you know your lines, you know where to be and what to do! You will put on a lovely show for your campers and for those of your families watching at home. I’m going to be out on stage shortly giving a brief intro to the play, and then it will be on with the show! Katherine’s stage manager, so just listen to her for your queue to start Act 1, Scene 1, and just like we rehearsed from there!

She left the backstage room and left the door cracked so we could hear her intro.

GOOD EVENING CAMPERS! I heard Penny call, welcome to Camp Sunshine’s annual play! It looks like have a really good turnout this year! And Hello to any of the parents of the cast watching at home! Your kids are an amazing bunch and I am so happy they are all here with us. And without further ado, our director, Claire!

Claire walked out from behind the set piece she was standing behind

Hello campers! So, as many of you may know, we like doing Shakespeare here, because the stories are timeless and malleable, we can play with gender, orientation, time period, setting, any thing and everything. Our play this year is Romeo and Juliet and I think its going to be one of our very best productions ever!

I know there are parents out there watching, we appreciate you supporting your kids in the best way you know how, by sending them to a place where they can be around other kids who are or might be like them, and see that they can be themselves! We have some people in our cast and crew exploring their gender tonight, and we hope that you will continue to love and support your kids, no matter who they figure out they are.

Backstage I blushed, did she really have to I said in a whisper to Lily with Marie right behind us

She literally says it every year, whether or not there are any discrete brochure kids in the cast

The play HAS been abridged, and adjusted to match the genders of the roles the people are or want to act as in the play, and I think without further ado, we shall get on with the show!

She came back behind the set piece and gave me a hug which surprised me

You are going to do amazing, and then she went and hugged Millie, and you as well! and all of you, go out there and knock em dead campers!

And with that, the play opened. I won’t recount the whole of the script, sword fights happened, and I said that famous line Romeo Romeo where fore art thou Romeo and it was going really well.

Intermission arrived faster than I expected, the time honestly just seemed to fly by, I went back stage to change, it wasn’t rushed, we were taking a 15 minute intermission.

Marie pulled me aside as I entered the costume room and whispered in my ear

I think you should check your phone

Why?

It’s been buzzing non stop for like, the entire first act

Maybe they are yelling at me and I don’t want to know about it

Maybe something happened?

If it did, theres not much I can do about it tonight, is there?

No I suppose not…

Ok then, lets get me changed and Ill check it after the finale and bow

She helped me get changed, checked my makeup really quick and did a slight touch up, the lights were hot and the evening was a touch muggy so I had been sweating some.

Katherine came in, 2 minute warning, 2 minute warning all, and I saw through the crack in the door the ‘house’ lights dimming a few times

Ok, lets do this!

Romeo and I had our death scenes, we stage kissed, the wrap up, was abbreviated but not entirely cut, and Romeo and I were back stage

Marie approached with my phone

Huh, uh, no, not til after we take the bow

No really Carly, check your phone Marie urged me

Ok… whats up?

It kept buzzing for about half of the second act, and then it stopped, and right as you did your death lines it buzzed again, and then I got a text from Penny, she said to get you to read it…

Ok… thats weird…

I mean, the parents do have her number for emergencies, maybe something happened?

I opened my phone and there were so many notifications it just coalesced them all… I unlocked it and was hit by tons of messages from my parents, which I didn’t really have time to read all of so I scrolled quickly to the bottom

We love you so much dear

Whoever you are, whatever gender, whoever you love, we love you, always and forever, we apologize for pulling the emergency handle and texting Penny, we selfishly wanted to be sure you saw this before the curtain call, and ask, maybe, if you are willing, you could introduce yourself to us at the bow?

And we are sorry to have sent you to camp unawares, we just couldn’t figure out how to get you to come out of your shell

I started crying, and Marie and Lily and Millie all noticed and came over and hugged me, are those happy tears, or sad tears? Lily asked

I don’t know? Happy I guess I sniffed, they want me to introduce myself at the curtain call

Im sure that can be arranged Marie said, if you want that is

I, I kind of do?

Marie smiled at me and walked over to whisper in Katherine’s ear who rushed off.

Marie came back over and helped me dab my tears without making a mess of my makeup, and the curtain call started, music had ramped up and cast were going out in a particular order, and Millie came over and held my hand, Ready?

Yeah, I think so I smiled

Then let’s do this!

We walked out on stage together, hand in hand, and joined hands with the rest of the cast, with Lily to my other side, and took a big bow, and then stepped back, as the applause continued, Penny made a motion from the front row, one more, and we did another big bow. And then Claire came out holding a microphone

Well how about that! You all were wonderful tonight! You did just an amazing job, under a very tight time schedule, and also a huge thanks to the crew of campers who helped us behind the scenes, and to all of you campers in the audience who turned up to watch us put on our silly little play!

And a huge round of applause for our leading lady and demi-girl, and two big boquets of flowers were brought out by a pair of the cast who had slipped backstage after the bow, and they handed us each one. And we have a very special request from our streaming audience, for our Juliet to reintroduce herself to her parents, which she has agreed to do

She came over and handed me the microphone and quietly said, you got this

I held the mic up and started a bit hesitantly, uh, Hello mom, dad, and uh, well everyone else watching. I came here a confused, isolated kid, who thought she was a boy, because thats all anyone had ever told her she could be. She knew she wanted to be a girl, but didn’t think it was actually possible, or that she fit some elusive criteria. She thought her name was different, she wore different clothes. Mom, Dad, Im your daughter Carly, and I love you so much for sending me here, I don’t know if I would’ve ever had the courage to explore this any other way.

And I want to thank everyone here who’s helped, and say that you are all really wonderful, the staff, the campers, my demi girl Romeo, you are amazing

Claire and Penny and Lily and Millie and everyone were clapping and many in the cast, crew and audience were crying, and so was I.

Penny made her way on stage quickly and I surrendered the microphone to her,

Ok campers who aren’t part of the cast and crew! Time to call it a night, we have a big day of beach partying tomorrow and I hope you all are looking forward to it!

Penny and some other staff hustled the other campers the rest out of the theater and back towards their cabins and I sat down on the edge of the stage and then flopped down on my back my arms spread, the flowers laying on my chest

Eventually I noticed Lily come up and sit down next to me on the edge of the stage,

I’m dead I said quietly to her while the rest of the cast went to get changed

Im so happy for you, and proud of you, you did it, you came out! Thats a huge step!

Marie came up and knelt down beside me, and your parents must be really big in to texting, theres a few more since then

We love you Carly! We are so happy you are our daughter, and you were amazing as Juliet, hugs and kisses!

Wait, did you get that name from that singer? Carly Ray Jepeson?

Oh don’t be silly dear, Im sure she got it from something else

I mean, have you ever looked at her phone’s music list? She’s the top played singer on there

I would never snoop on her phone! What she listens to is her business

I just saw it by accident one day, honest

Anyways, we love you Carly, and its a wonderful name, it suits you!

I laughed, of course mom had seen my phone’s top played at some point. I probably forgot and left it plugged in to the stereo one day. I sent back

I love both of you you silly gooses, and Im tired, and I think theres more things to do tonight, see you on Saturday?

We wouldn’t miss it for the world Carly, and your dad even managed to get a screen cap of you as Juliet as a temp profile photo for your contact!

lol, goodnight mom and dad

I put my phone down, and gestured that I needed help getting up. Lily and Marie helped me up, and Lily carried my flowers with us backstage.

Marie helped me get my makeup off, and she started to take the wig off

Can I leave it on? For the cast party?

Marie winked at me, sure, but the costume stays here!

I laughed, sure, ok, things too big to move around in on camp trails anyways

They helped me get the outer dress off, and I quickly changed back in to my capris, t-shirt, and left my wig on, and looking in the mirror I liked it… but… something was missing

Could I have some proper lip gloss? not the stage stuff?

Sure Marie laughed, and handed me a tube of sparkly pink lip gloss, which Lily showed me how to put on.

Perfect!

The other campers had already finished by this point and were heading out to the dining hall for the after party.

Lily and I were the last campers out, as Marie and Claire locked up the stage behind us, making sure everything was shut off, and the four of us walked to the dining hall.

When we walked in, a cheer went up from the assembled cast members, and then they parted to let us at the pizza and cake that had been prepared and was waiting to be cut by Millie and me.

Millie said about time you showed up she said, winking at me, you text your parents back any?

A bit, and then I raised my voice, Let’s get this party started!! I said loudly to the room, and we both cut off large corners of a sheet cake with an icing drawing of Romeo and Juliet in the balcony scene on it. I also grabbed a couple slices of a pepperoni pizza, there were a number of varieties available, including a couple flagged as vegan that still had some manner of cheese on it, which was nice.

The staff let kids have first pick then came in and got their own, we mingled, we laughed, someone hooked up their phone to the stereo in the dining hall and played music and I danced for the first time in forever to the songs I loved. I rarely danced even hidden in my room and it was so liberating to just be me. I didn’t really dance ‘with’ anyone, but dancing in the presence of others also dancing and singing along loudly just put a huge grin on my face

As the night wore on, people trickled out, until Lily and I were among the last when Claire went over and turned the music off and said ok kiddo’s, I know today was amazing, but you still need some sleep, off to your cabins with you, and be quiet, your fellow campers are mostly already asleep

Marie was still at the dining hall and walked back with us to the cabin, reminding me to take my wig and carefully set it on the top of my chest and we would deal with it tomorrow

We got in quietly, and wordlessly changed in pajama’s and slipped in to bed and I nearly forgot to take the wig off, but I put it carefully on top of my locker, and taking the wig cap and pins off too.

I fell in to a deeper sleep than I think I had ever had, I was emotionally and physically exhausted.

Friday